Our life is kinda Fast and Furious. I mean, just look at where we are finishing up today…….either at fast or at furious…….or sometimes at both. In the era of fast food, the so-called ‘fast’ word is getting attached with almost everything. Be it data-speed or car-speed, we always long for the fastest. Love-startups and break-ups both are executed within a blink of an eye. We get infatuated in a jiffy, while loathing for the same begin to lurk in shorter period than that. Even, these days ‘normal-datings’ are being replaced by ‘speed-datings’. And thirsts for swift career-suits are no longer behind the curtains. The whole scene sights like we are playing the ‘rapid-fire’ round of life’s game. No?
Amidst all these speedy occurrences, we should not forget the fastest performance of ‘Divorce’……….actually, I should term it as ‘
Quick-Divorces’. Abusive husbands or demanding wives, marital discontent or adulterous disposition, ego-problems or trust-issues…..whatever be the reason, it takes only one ignited moment’s thought to break that B’ful bond, let alone second thoughts or afterthoughts. I am not seconding the idea that you should suffer any domestic violence or you should keep suffocating in a relationship when whole situation is over the brim. No, it’s not just. Rather, in lieu of hurting yourself everyday in every way, you should crack that thread. But still as far as your problem-solving skills can be applied please apply because Divorce is not the solution to a troubled marriage, it’s just a runaway, a remarkably bad one that blockages almost all future prospects. And it becomes the worst when your youngs are involved in it. Because ‘Divorce’ may seem a little word, but it brings drastic effects with it. The dreaded ‘D’ introduces a massive change into the life of a boy or girl no matter what the age. Though children and adolescent suffer differently, react differently, but they do suffer, they do react. Academically, financially, emotionally and psychologically, Divorce devasts their lives. Leaving aside some ordinary outcomes like crying, clinging, whining, bed-wetting, there are also some-not-so-ordinary ones that keep telling upon their lives. Dropping out school, poor school grades, less participation in extra-curricular activities, social withdrawal, irrational behavior, frequent frustration, increased inferiority complex, poverty-ridden life, addiction to drugs and alcohol, deviation from right path to name a few. However not every child of a divorced pair commits crime or drops out. In fact some do well in school and even become great achievers, but still we know that even these children experience deep and lasting trauma throughout their life.
Daily absence of one parent while living with another is something that we intact couple’s children are unable to understand. Finite choices, emotional scars, pitying eyes and stark questions from friends and society are enough to tear them up inside. In addition to that, some children are burdened with the responsibilities of their parents while they are still in their growing ages. They feel forced to look after their mothers or fathers as the relationship breaks down. They have to be much responsible because one or both parents are not functioning well as a parent; …..And mean whilst they lose their childhood, they lose their adolescence, they lose their blessedness ……..they lose one major ingredient for life-making. The split leaves such a stigma that their virtues are suspected during their marriageable age, they are feared of being turned out like their separated parents, sometimes nicer marriage-proposals slip away from their hands and they have to adjust with it………….with almost everything. Each day rises to supply a new adjustment. Each moment happens only to enhance their single-parent's love-lorn life, their loneliness....and that loss of love in their parents' life really rips them apart. Even at the happiest moment (such as graduations, celebrations, marriages, child-birth) life itself reminds them of their loss, brings up the loss created by divorce.
Though some are in support with step-parenting, but in true sense the impact of father or mother's loss is not likely to be diminished by the introduction of virtual parents. No one can replace biological mom & dad, .......and secondally not every step-parent is Yeh Hai Mohabbatein's Ishita. So parents should take a long pause before choosing divorce. While it may seem like a solution to you, its not an easy way out for your kids. In this time of 'quick divorces' believe in the magic of love and its power to heal even the greatest wounds. Don't let your differences breed and kill your relationship. Talk and resolve your issues. Be the first to forgive and forget.
